Britney Spears gets front page billing for a stage-kiss with Madonna. For all the attention you'd think she was having her baby. Apparently though, Papa don't preach.

Johnny Depp speaks against the US, saying it's a "dumb puppy with big teeth"* and, after backlash, has to recant.

Meanwhile, girlkissy Britney swears she wouldn't kiss a girl again, unless it was Madonna. Then she goes on to wax political, saying, "Honestly, I think we should just trust our president in every decision that he makes and we should just support that."

Heaven forbid we should think twice about politi-media fabrications like the Jessica Lynch story.